"What makes you different from anyone else is that you are prepared," Gail said. "No one can do what you can do at that moment." Gail, my Rehoboth supervisor, said this because I was having major doubts. Because the moment I see thirty pairs of eyes looking me over, making sure I'm legit, I question my ability. The first day of school I was entirely too nervous--nervous smiles, nervous waves, nervous words, nervous hands. Nervous.
So now, two weeks into student teaching, I have been thinking about truly preparing myself. And here's where I say that I have to unlearn all my college ways. Procrastination is no longer an option.
Not in life.
So I am now going to quit procrastinating tomorrow's lesson plans and get going.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
Hiking, anyone?
I have discovered that when life begins to drone on, all a person really has to do is find a way to step out of routine. I remember Dad's lengthy trucking trips, ones where he would be gone two weeks at a time and how my family could spend time normally without him. But when he came home, there were those moments, when the bills were still unpaid, when the garden was still not weeded, when the house needed desperate attention, that Dad would say, "Alright, tomorrow morning we go fishing." And with my brothers, my dad, and me, all scattered down the shore of Canyon Ferry, we cast our lines and sat around in lawn chairs, embracing the grace in getting away.
Somehow, in the midst of studying with my nose in a book for the past three and a half years, my life has drastically changed its course. I am much more used to spending time studying than exploring the outdoors. But because of this new direction, I have grown to love two things: living life and reading about living life. I suppose that if I could read and hike and enjoy God's gorgeous New Mexico sunsets, I would.
Somehow, in the midst of studying with my nose in a book for the past three and a half years, my life has drastically changed its course. I am much more used to spending time studying than exploring the outdoors. But because of this new direction, I have grown to love two things: living life and reading about living life. I suppose that if I could read and hike and enjoy God's gorgeous New Mexico sunsets, I would.
This weekend, even though I had only spent one whole week in school, a getaway sounded like the perfect chance to see another side of Rehoboth. A person would never believe the kind of natural monuments that bulge and poke out of the New Mexico brush. The sandstone is jagged and fierce in some places and in others flows and glides with the land.
The Crevice was our first hike. Majestic towers of burnt red sandstone surrounded us on three sides. Jalynn and Ben guided us. The group climbed over big boulders and through shrubs and through snow at some parts. At the very end of the hike is a part where two walls of rock begin to form a canyon. We descended down into the canyon, following flash flood trails toward The Crevice. "Okay, you guys," said Jalynn, a native to this area and an expert rock climber, "You just rest your back on this wall and push your feet on that wall and shimmy your way over." And we did. We shimmied and scooted and looked down nervously at the long drop in some parts. This counts, I thought. This place is unlike any I have ever known. And I'm sure Dad would approve.
Church Rock we hiked last night, and we spent the better part of the trip bushwacking through the brush to find our way. It's amazing how these seemingly small towers off on the horizon are really large and daunting. But we made it, all of us. And the hike was beautiful. And it makes me more excited to keep exploring and to keep stepping out of routine.Anyway, I met all kinds of people here who make Rehoboth the place it is. Mike and Gail De Young. Aleke. Jenna, Erin, Hannah, Megan, Jalynn. Rachael and Sean. All the teachers. Carol. These people are who make enjoying the hikes and the school and the town worthwhile.
I suppose that my Dad and brothers were the ones who made those Saturday fishing trips worthwhile.
So, I guess this week step out of routine with people who make life important. Thank the Lord for them!
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
A Three-Day Roadtrip with Grandma
"I'm driving with you to New Mexico," said Grandma.
"I can drive by myself," I reassured her. "I drove back to Sioux Falls once with out-of-date perscription glasses."
"You're not going by yourself."
And that was it. Apparently I wasn't going by myself. She had already planned her course of action before I had the opportunity to turn her down. We were going to take Grandpa Fred to Salt Lake so he could visit his daughter (my step-aunt), and we were going to stay there a night. Monday night we would be to Moab, Utah. The next day we'd be in Rehoboth. Grandma would stay with me that night and catch a Greyhound to Phoenix to visit friends the next morning.
This morning before I sent her off, I said, "If he comes from the back, headbutt him. That'll break his nose. Then stomp on his foot with your heal. That should do it." Self defense for a 67-year-old woman is very important. She simply nodded her head and patted my shoulder.
"There'll be no problem. You know I sleep with one eye open."
"I know."
And with that she hugged me and kissed my cheek, leaving bright red lipstick smudged across my freckles. "I love you," she said.
"I love you too, Grandma."
Watching Grandma board the bus, I breathed a sigh of relief. Kearsen and I had breathed the same sigh of relief when Grandma left after a two-week stay in Sious Falls. She was always up at seven, dressed, primmed, awake, and ready to go. When Grandma left, Kearsen and I collapsed on her couch, exhausted. But there she went, the woman who took her twelve-year-old granddaughter white water rafting in Yellowstone the summer after Grandpa died. The same woman who put up all her Christmas lights this Christmas because, by gum, she could still do it. The woman who fed thirty people throughout this Christmas vacation. She is the most independant woman I know. So the past three days, Grandma toted me along through the mountains and canyon lands of Montana, Utah, and New Mexico (and a little bit of Arizona) reminding me of life's responsibilities a little at a time.
Here's what I learned:
1. Grandma loves Johnny Cash. Of the CDs I own, I own about two Christian praise and worship CDs, and about four CDs with absolutely no swearing. I played and replayed those ones, something like WOW Worship and the Roby Family hymns, but there she sat, somewhat contented. The last CD in my case was this $5 Johnny Cash top hits from Wal Mart. Couldn't hurt, I thought. I popped it in and at the first note of Mr. Cash's baratone voice, Grandma said, "Hoh! Now this is what I like!" She knew every word. She knew every note. She tapped her fingers and bounced her head from side to side.
2. Grandma will listen to rap if it means spending time with her grandchildren. "Why is this guy wanting to skip stones?" "Just feel the beat, Grandma." "He's not gonna let what go? He was talking too fast." "Nothing, Grandma. The words don't matter." "Hmph."
3. Utah is a Mormon state. Grandma detests what they believe. "Look at those dirty old cold temples. That statue! Look at that statue. Dumb idols, they worship."
4. I've known this before, but my great great grandpa was a Mormon polygamist. He had four wives and two of them were sisters. They each had eight or more kids. He separated with one of his wives but still sent money to her and the kids. Ugh, 32 kids (at least!). Anyway, I'm reading this book The New York Regional Mormon Singles Dance: A memoior by Elna Baker. Our ideas on life are completely different, but she's wickedly funny, and I'm probably related to her. As Grandma and I were driving I thought about Mormanism a lot and what justifies their belief system. In Moab I looked in the hotel drawyer and saw the Book of Mormon. I opened it and began reading and thought, Who are these people? and other thoughts like, Who is this God they believe in? and Do they really believe they can be Gods someday? But I thought of all this because my Grandpa Boman (Grandma's first husband) grew up in the Mormon tradition, and he said he felt deceived; his young adult life was filled with regurgitation. Not all that different from some of Christianity. We regurgitate answers and we act the part of a stewardly Christian without truly living the part, but the underlying understanding of God is worlds apart. Is it about us, or is it about God? Anyway, this is something I'm thinking through, and I want to know all I can.
5. I like to be quiet until I like to talk. Grandma likes to talk until she likes to be quiet. Interesting mix.
6. The canyon lands of Utah look like those mirage books you get from Scholastic book orders. You can't really tell how deep they go or where they stop, and defining their shape is useless.
7. Novel ideas in naming historic landmarks are probably not so novel. Observe exhibit A:
Observed: Big, beached whale-looking boulder
Me: "Look Grandma, that boulder looks like a big beached whale!"
Grandma: "Wow, it really does!"
Sign: Whale Rock
Me: [Frown]
Grandma: [Laughs]
8. Grandma likes to feed people, namely her granddaughter.
9. Grandma and I are both stubborn. No examples necessary.
10. New Mexico can have snow, too. Good thing I didn't only pack shorts and T-shirts. We were ready to get out of the car and stretch our arms in the nice, warm air, but all we did was shivver. Right now I'm cold, but if you live in Montana or South Dakota you're probably colder :)
Grandma's crazy, but so am I. I have a lot to learn, but so does she. Grandma's stubborn and frustrates me and my pride sometimes, but I do the same. But we had a safe trip and a good time all around. I love her very much.
I'm ready to be by myself, doing my own thing.
I guess I haven't looked in a mirror yet today. I should go rub that lipstick off for good.
Red lipstick kisses to you all,
Laurissa
"I can drive by myself," I reassured her. "I drove back to Sioux Falls once with out-of-date perscription glasses."
"You're not going by yourself."
And that was it. Apparently I wasn't going by myself. She had already planned her course of action before I had the opportunity to turn her down. We were going to take Grandpa Fred to Salt Lake so he could visit his daughter (my step-aunt), and we were going to stay there a night. Monday night we would be to Moab, Utah. The next day we'd be in Rehoboth. Grandma would stay with me that night and catch a Greyhound to Phoenix to visit friends the next morning.
This morning before I sent her off, I said, "If he comes from the back, headbutt him. That'll break his nose. Then stomp on his foot with your heal. That should do it." Self defense for a 67-year-old woman is very important. She simply nodded her head and patted my shoulder.
"There'll be no problem. You know I sleep with one eye open."
"I know."
And with that she hugged me and kissed my cheek, leaving bright red lipstick smudged across my freckles. "I love you," she said.
"I love you too, Grandma."
Watching Grandma board the bus, I breathed a sigh of relief. Kearsen and I had breathed the same sigh of relief when Grandma left after a two-week stay in Sious Falls. She was always up at seven, dressed, primmed, awake, and ready to go. When Grandma left, Kearsen and I collapsed on her couch, exhausted. But there she went, the woman who took her twelve-year-old granddaughter white water rafting in Yellowstone the summer after Grandpa died. The same woman who put up all her Christmas lights this Christmas because, by gum, she could still do it. The woman who fed thirty people throughout this Christmas vacation. She is the most independant woman I know. So the past three days, Grandma toted me along through the mountains and canyon lands of Montana, Utah, and New Mexico (and a little bit of Arizona) reminding me of life's responsibilities a little at a time.
Here's what I learned:
1. Grandma loves Johnny Cash. Of the CDs I own, I own about two Christian praise and worship CDs, and about four CDs with absolutely no swearing. I played and replayed those ones, something like WOW Worship and the Roby Family hymns, but there she sat, somewhat contented. The last CD in my case was this $5 Johnny Cash top hits from Wal Mart. Couldn't hurt, I thought. I popped it in and at the first note of Mr. Cash's baratone voice, Grandma said, "Hoh! Now this is what I like!" She knew every word. She knew every note. She tapped her fingers and bounced her head from side to side.
2. Grandma will listen to rap if it means spending time with her grandchildren. "Why is this guy wanting to skip stones?" "Just feel the beat, Grandma." "He's not gonna let what go? He was talking too fast." "Nothing, Grandma. The words don't matter." "Hmph."
3. Utah is a Mormon state. Grandma detests what they believe. "Look at those dirty old cold temples. That statue! Look at that statue. Dumb idols, they worship."
4. I've known this before, but my great great grandpa was a Mormon polygamist. He had four wives and two of them were sisters. They each had eight or more kids. He separated with one of his wives but still sent money to her and the kids. Ugh, 32 kids (at least!). Anyway, I'm reading this book The New York Regional Mormon Singles Dance: A memoior by Elna Baker. Our ideas on life are completely different, but she's wickedly funny, and I'm probably related to her. As Grandma and I were driving I thought about Mormanism a lot and what justifies their belief system. In Moab I looked in the hotel drawyer and saw the Book of Mormon. I opened it and began reading and thought, Who are these people? and other thoughts like, Who is this God they believe in? and Do they really believe they can be Gods someday? But I thought of all this because my Grandpa Boman (Grandma's first husband) grew up in the Mormon tradition, and he said he felt deceived; his young adult life was filled with regurgitation. Not all that different from some of Christianity. We regurgitate answers and we act the part of a stewardly Christian without truly living the part, but the underlying understanding of God is worlds apart. Is it about us, or is it about God? Anyway, this is something I'm thinking through, and I want to know all I can.
5. I like to be quiet until I like to talk. Grandma likes to talk until she likes to be quiet. Interesting mix.
6. The canyon lands of Utah look like those mirage books you get from Scholastic book orders. You can't really tell how deep they go or where they stop, and defining their shape is useless.
7. Novel ideas in naming historic landmarks are probably not so novel. Observe exhibit A:
Observed: Big, beached whale-looking boulder
Me: "Look Grandma, that boulder looks like a big beached whale!"
Grandma: "Wow, it really does!"
Sign: Whale Rock
Me: [Frown]
Grandma: [Laughs]
8. Grandma likes to feed people, namely her granddaughter.
9. Grandma and I are both stubborn. No examples necessary.
10. New Mexico can have snow, too. Good thing I didn't only pack shorts and T-shirts. We were ready to get out of the car and stretch our arms in the nice, warm air, but all we did was shivver. Right now I'm cold, but if you live in Montana or South Dakota you're probably colder :)
Grandma's crazy, but so am I. I have a lot to learn, but so does she. Grandma's stubborn and frustrates me and my pride sometimes, but I do the same. But we had a safe trip and a good time all around. I love her very much.
I'm ready to be by myself, doing my own thing.
I guess I haven't looked in a mirror yet today. I should go rub that lipstick off for good.
Red lipstick kisses to you all,
Laurissa
Friday, January 1, 2010
In and out
Considering I thought it was 2010 midway through 2009, transitioning hasn't been too difficult. I sat on Beth's couch while her sister danced around saying, "Do all the things you'll never do in 2009 again!" So I said goodbye to Dordt and to the past and said hello to student teaching and to finding a real job.
New years resolutions/things to accomplish:
1. Write a letter a week
2. See the Grand Canyon
3. Carve my name somewhere in Rehoboth
4. Quit trash-reality TV
5. Graduate
6. Find summer employment
7. Find employment
8. Google quick ways to learn student names
9. Attend all those weddings (Start a petition for TLC to cancel Say Yes to the Dress)
10. Welcome my golden birthday, July 23, by watching The Number 23.
Here's a big ol' hug to the next decade that brings me out of college and into calling.
New years resolutions/things to accomplish:
1. Write a letter a week
2. See the Grand Canyon
3. Carve my name somewhere in Rehoboth
4. Quit trash-reality TV
5. Graduate
6. Find summer employment
7. Find employment
8. Google quick ways to learn student names
9. Attend all those weddings (Start a petition for TLC to cancel Say Yes to the Dress)
10. Welcome my golden birthday, July 23, by watching The Number 23.
Here's a big ol' hug to the next decade that brings me out of college and into calling.
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